Daniel Im

Pastor + Author

life

“Judge not” is not about being blind

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We live in such an interesting point in time, don’t we?

On the one hand, we’re encouraged to rate and review everything—our favourite restaurants, businesses, workouts, books, podcasts, shows, and even professors and doctors! In fact, not only are we encouraged, but we’re even incentivized to do so! But at the same time, we’re also drowning in criticism, contempt, and a wildfire of seemingly knee-jerk reactions and poorly thought-out opinions to tweets, rumours, and news articles—both real and fake.

Hmm…I wonder if there’s a connection?

When Jesus said, “Do not judge, so that you won’t be judged,” was this what he was referring to? Was he warning us about the perils of five-star ratings, and industries built upon crowd sourcing reviews? Or was he perhaps talking about all of the subtle—and also overt—ways that we pass judgement onto others? Like, “I can’t believe they parked like that! How inconsiderate.” Or, “What a show off. What is he trying to prove posting that on the internet?”

It’s the latter!

When Jesus said “Do not judge, so that you won’t be judged,” he’s referring to all of the ways that we judge others through our thoughts, our ensuing facial reactions, or the words that come out of our mouths. He’s talking about the tendency that we have to often criticize, condemn, find fault with, or think that we’re higher or better than others—especially when we’re “hangry” or tired.

Let’s take a look at the whole passage,

Do not judge, so that you won’t be judged. For you will be judged by the same standard with which you judge others, and you will be measured by the same measure you use. Why do you look at the splinter in your brother’s eye but don’t notice the beam of wood in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the splinter out of your eye,’ and look, there’s a beam of wood in your own eye? Hypocrite! First take the beam of wood out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to take the splinter out of your brother’s eye. (Matthew 7:1-5 CSB)

Now after reading this, it’s completely reasonable to think to yourself, “Alright so…to help me not judge, I’m just going to keep my head down and turn a blind eye to everything!”

Note that I said “reasonable to think to yourself,” and not “reasonable to do.” Going to an extreme like this is not the way to live out Jesus’ command to “Judge not.”

I love how the theologian and pastor, John Stott, explains this passage,

To sum up, the command to judge not is not a requirement to be blind, but rather a plea to be generous. Jesus does not tell us to cease to be men (by suspending our critical powers which help to distinguish us from animals) but to renounce the presumptuous ambition to be God (by setting ourselves up as judges).

Oh how we often fall into this trap!

I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve caught myself—mid-sentence—yelling at my kids to stop yelling at each other. When we judge others like this, we’re hypocrites. We’re near-sighted hypocrites who don’t realize that we’re pointing out the splinter in another’s eye, while we ourselves have a beam of wood in ours!

So the next time you find yourself tempted to pass judgement on another person…

…what do you think would happen if you paused and first asked yourself, “When have I been guilty of this myself?” And then went to the cross and spent time in prayer for yourself and for the other person, instead of judgement?

Friends, let’s judge not!

Underneath the Surface of Disney’s Hit Song, “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”

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Over the past month, have you caught yourself singing a song about Bruno?

Or, I guess to put it more accurately, not talking about Bruno? Because of the enormous popularity of “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” from Disney’s 2021 film, Encanto, this song has stayed on the Top 10 Billboard chart for weeks in several countries.

Now the purpose for this article isn’t to talk about the “magic” in this movie (and to go down that rabbit hole). Rather, it’s to address the ways that the songs and themes in this movie are actually perpetuating lies about our identity—and feeding us (and our children) lies about ourselves.

When I wrote You Are What You Do: And Six Other Lies About Work, Life, and Love, I was attempting to shine a spotlight on seven different lies about our identity—and how to discover the truth on the other side. Now the thing about these lies is that they don’t actually seem harmful on the surface—they just seem more of a matter of fact than anything. But when you dig underneath the surface, and begin unpacking how these lies are shaping your relationships, your understanding of self, and your emotional, physical, and spiritual health…you start realizing that these lies aren’t as harmless as they appear to be.

Now just to be clear, “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” is musical genius. My family and I couldn’t stop listening to the song because it’s so catchy, fun, and mesmerizing musically. But the more I listened to the song, the more I realized that it was the music and not the lyrics that I fell in love with.

Why shouldn’t the family talk about Bruno? Why is it okay to expel someone from the family? Why don’t people know the actual reason he was ex-communicated? And how in the world can someone survive in the walls of a house?! (Sorry for the spoiler).

I recognize that yes, this is just a movie, but could songs like this be unintentionally feeding our children lies about their identity like “you are what you do” and “you are your past”?

In the movie, we see that Abuela, the matriarch of the family, had cultivated a culture where lies like those ones were the core source of everyone’s identity. Because of her past—both the death of her husband and the way her house came to be—her whole family was living proof that “you are your past.” And when you consider the way that everything revolved around an individual’s gift, what other message than “you are what you do” was being communicated to the one with the gift and everyone around them? No wonder Mirabel’s sister, Luisa, was crumbling under the surface from the pressure placed on her.

Oh and let’s not forget the lie that made the hit song, “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” possible! Because Abuela believed the lie that “you are who you raise,” there was no way she could allow Bruno to reflect back on her in anyway…hence the reason no one talks about Bruno!

So What?

Friends, this is why I wrote You Are What You Do: And Six Other Lies About Work, Life, and Love. I wrote it to help us recognize the lies that our culture is subtly feeding us about ourselves. The book—and this article—are not indictments to boycott this movie or our culture. Rather, they are pleas to become more discerning about what messages we’re subtly listening to and letting shape who we are and how we live, work, and love.

If you haven’t yet picked up a copy of the book, I’d be honored if you would do so either by going to Amazon or checking out my book page to learn more about it.

A Pattern for Prayer

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If you were to describe your prayer life with three words, which of the following three words would you use?

Here are a few that you can choose from:

Brief, dusty, faithless, abiding, fresh, faith-filled, duty, boring, lacking, privilege, courageous, fulfilling, me-centered, depressing, fickle, others-centered, joyful, persevering

It’s interesting how differently we all view prayer, isn’t it?

In the church I grew up in, prayer was dependence, it was surrender, it was pleading, it was passionate, and it was a duty. Daily, there were early morning prayer gatherings at the church. Weekly, the congregation would come early before the service started to pray and prepare their hearts. And annually at youth retreats, the prayer time went for hours.

In fact, when Christina and I first moved to Seoul, Korea to pastor there, we were staying in a guest room at the church, until we found an apartment. The next morning, I remember being awoken to, what sounded like, thousands of people talking…which I later discovered was actually the case because thousands of people were talking to God at the early morning prayer service!

The congregation we served in Korea understood that spending time with God was the essence of prayer, as David Benner describes:

Spending time with God ought to be the essence of prayer. However, as it is usually practiced, prayer is more like a series of e-mail or instant messages than hanging out together…It should not be a surprise that the result is a superficial relationship.

Spending time with God ought to be the essence of prayer. – David Benner
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They understood the importance of spending time with God together with others. They didn’t see prayer as a duty which must be performed. They saw prayer as a privilege to be enjoyed.

And as E.M. Bounds so aptly put it, “a rare delight that is always revealing some new beauty.”

Prayer is a rare delight that is always revealing some new beauty – E.M. Bounds.
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How about you? How do you currently view prayer? And how do you want to?

In Philippians 1:3-8, Paul presents a pattern for prayer: to pray with thanksgiving, joy, and perseverance.

I give thanks to my God for every remembrance of you, always praying with joy for all of you in my every prayer, because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. I am sure of this, that he who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. Indeed, it is right for me to think this way about all of you, because I have you in my heart, and you are all partners with me in grace, both in my imprisonment and in the defense and confirmation of the gospel. For God is my witness, how deeply I miss all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. (Philippians 1:3-8 CSB)

This pattern for prayer isn’t a rigid structure for prayer, nor is it comprehensive. Rather, it’s more of a pattern that describes Paul’s prayer life—and I believe that this pattern is one that we should reflect on, and measure our prayer life against.

1. Pray with thanksgiving

Instead of grumbling, Paul chose to give thanks. He didn’t allow his circumstances to lead his response. Instead, he saw his circumstances through the lens of who he knew God to be, as revealed through the Scriptures.

He knew that God was in control, even if his circumstances felt out of control. He knew that God was faithful, even if things felt uncertain. He knew that God was always present, even if he felt abandoned. And he knew that God saw him and was always with him. In other words, instead of looking around, Paul looked up and he gave thanks.

2. Pray with joy

The interesting thing about joy is that you can’t choose it. You can make yourself laugh, and you might even be able to make yourself feel happy, but you can’t choose joy. This is because joy is a fruit of the Spirit and evidence that you have a personal relationship with God and are filled with the Holy Spirit (Gal 5:22; Rom 14:17).

In other words, joy isn’t circumstantial. Joy is a result of the gospel. You don’t experience more joy when everything feels certain. Joy is not a result of a better job, a better relationship, better health, or a better address. Joy is a result of having and cultivating a personal relationship with Jesus.

Joy isn’t circumstantial. Joy is a result of the gospel.
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This is why you can grieve and still rejoice, why you can have joy in the midst of sorrow, and why you can have nothing, yet possess everything.

3. Pray with perseverance

Perseverance is something that was cultivated in Paul’s heart and prayer life because he did life together with the Philippians. As Paul regularly practiced gathering, growing, giving, and going together with the Philippians, he grew in perseverance with them. And as their bond strengthened with one another, they went from being acquaintances to co-workers.

We see evidence of this because the Philippians never turned their backs on him. While he was in prison, they supported him in prayer and with financial support. They weren’t ashamed of him—even though imprisonment would’ve brought great shame in that time. Instead, they supported him as he shared the gospel with his captors, fellow prisoners, and judges over him.

So in conclusion, what needs to happen for your prayer life to be marked with thanksgiving, joy, and perseverance?

My dear friends, let us “Rejoice always, pray constantly, give thanks in everything; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thess 5:16-18 CSB).

*My article here was originally published on September 8, 2021 on Impactus.

How to Actually Make Friends (these days…)

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These days, isn’t it so easy to make friends?

All you have to do is click “confirm” or “add” and you’re done! You now have another friend. Long gone are those awkward “getting to know you” conversations. All you have to do is scroll through their feed, like their photos, post a couple comments, and in no time you’ll be getting hundreds of friends saying happy birthday to you annually.

As blatantly sarcastic as I’m being, if you were to be brutally honest with yourself, I’m sure there’s been a moment when you’ve called a Facebook friend an actual friend—even though you’ve never actually seen them face to face. Or you at least know someone who has done this.

Is this what friendship has come to? Why does it seem so hard to make genuine friends? And keep them?

I know we often use busyness as an excuse for not making or cultivating friendships—I’ll be the first one to admit to that—but have you ever considered the consequences of delaying the formation of genuine friendships?

Have you ever considered the consequences of delaying the formation of genuine friendships?
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To answer that question, let’s take a look at James 5:13-14. While this passage is often quoted when someone is sick and is needing the healing touch of Jesus, I also believe it has a deep measure of insight to the topic at hand.

Is anyone among you suffering? He should pray. Is anyone cheerful? He should sing praises. Is anyone among you sick? He should call for the elders of the church, and they are to pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. (James 5:13-14 CSB)

What do you think James is getting at when he’s asking, “Is anyone among you…?” Do you think he’s just asking whether or not you are aware of what’s going on around you? Whether you are connected enough to others to know and notice if anyone among you is suffering?

While I recognize that there are some people—like my wife Christina—who can intuitively sense and feel the emotions of others, I’ve lived long enough to know that this doesn’t come naturally to everyone. I actually need to know that something is going on in someone’s life to be able to do something for them and be a friend for them.

To know this requires several things:

  • It requires me to lift my head up, get out of my own little world, and take my headphones off.
  • It requires me to begin eating with others, asking questions, and listening—both to them and to the promptings of the Holy Spirit to know what to say and what not to say.
  • It requires me to go earlier and stick around longer, so that I can have conversations with others beyond whatever meeting I’ve come to.
  • It requires me to budget a little bit more to eating out, so that I can go out to lunch with others after church, or go out to coffee with my neighbours and coworkers.
  • It requires the use of a slow cooker when I have others over, so that I can have more time to listen, talk, and engage with others when they come over.
  • And it also requires me being okay with my home—and not obsessing over how it looks, what type of floor I have, or even how clean it is.

In other words, to know whether something is going on in someone else’s life, I need to first be present and be a friend—something that just doesn’t happen overnight!!

So let me ask you a few questions:

  1. Is anyone among you suffering? Instead of just telling them to go and pray, what if you were to go and pray with them?
  2. Is anyone among you cheerful? Instead of just being happy for them, what would happen if you celebrated with them?
  3. And is anyone among you sick? Instead of just saying that you’ll pray for them, what would happen if you were to drop off a meal for them? Visit with them over FaceTime or Zoom? And also help mobilize the elders of your church and prayer team to pray for them?

In today’s world where it’s so easy to “use” people and treat them as a means to an end, let’s resolve to be the kind of people who can easily answer the question, “Is anyone among you…?”

*My article here was originally published on January 5, 2021 on Impactus.

Why You Might Be Feeling Busy

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Are you busy?

I’m not asking whether or not your calendar or plate is “full.” I’m asking whether you feel busy, rushed, or hurried deep within?

One researcher discovered that many Christians fall into a vicious cycle of busyness that leads to distraction from God:

  1. “Christians are assimilating a culture of busyness, hurry and overload, which leads to…
  2. God becoming more marginalized in Christians’ lives, which leads to…
  3. A deteriorating relationship with God, which leads to…
  4. Christians becoming even more vulnerable to adopting secular assumptions about how to live, which leads to…
  5. More conformity to a culture of busyness, hurry and overload. And then the cycle begins again.” [1]

This year, I want to challenge you to actively resist that.

That impulse inside of you, which makes you believe you are what you do. That whisper inside your head, which causes you to think your worth comes from your output. And that voice from our culture, which glorifies the busy and vilifies the idle.

That. That thing. That impulse. That whisper. That voice. In 2021, let’s together resist THAT.

I love how Ruth Haley Barton puts it in her book, Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership,

When we keep pushing forward without taking adequate time for rest and replenishment, our way of life may seem heroic, but there is a frenetic quality to our work that lacks true effectiveness because we have lost the ability to be present to God, to be present to other people and to discern what is really needed in our situation. The result can be “sloppy desperation”: a mental and spiritual lethargy that prevents the quality of presence that would deliver true insight and spiritual leadership…When we are rested, however, we bring steady, alert attention that is characterized by true discernment about what is truly needed in our situation, and the energy and creativity to carry it out.[2]

The path to resisting that, is not found in holidays, vacations, or getting away.

Freedom from busyness is not found in holidays, vacations, or getting away.
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The path to resistance is the Sabbath—one day a week where we are not doing what we have to do, but a day where we get to be. It’s a day to rest, a day to rejoice, and a day to worship.

The Sabbath is that day—once a week—where we are reminded that we are not human doings, but human beings, and that God is God, not us.

The Sabbath is that day where we remember that God did not rest on the seventh day because He was tired, but because He knew how much we needed it. And heck, if HE RESTED, what excuse do we have not to?

The path to resistance is the Sabbath—one day a week where we are not doing what we have to do, but a day where we get to be.
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I love how Mark Buchanan describes the Sabbath in his book, The Rest of God: Restoring Your Soul by Restoring the Sabbath,

Sabbath is that one day. It is a reprieve from what you ought to do, even though the list of oughts is infinitely long and never done. Oughts are tyrants, noisy and surly, chronically dissatisfied. Sabbath is the day you trade places with them: they go in the salt mine, and you go out dancing. It’s the one day when the only thing you must do is to not do the things you must. You are given permission— issued a command, to be blunt—to turn your back on all those oughts. You get to willfully ignore the many niggling things your existence genuinely depends on—and is often hobbled beneath—so that you can turn to whatever you’ve put off and pushed away for lack of time, lack of room, lack of breath. You get to shuck the have-tos and lay hold of the get-tos.[3]

Wow. Sabbath is that day once a week where we get to “shuck the have-tos and lay hold of the get-tos.” I love that.

Sabbath is that day once a week where we get to ‘shuck the have-tos and lay hold of the get-tos.’
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Here’s the thing though. It will be nearly impossible to start practicing the Sabbath, unless you first edit the other six days.

Did you catch that? You can’t just add the Sabbath onto your proverbial list of to-dos. If you take that approach, the Sabbath will feel more like a burden than a blessing.

Practicing the Sabbath is a re-orientation to life, a re-orientation to ministry, a re-orientation to priorities, and a re-orientation to grocery shopping, vacuuming, and all the other “have-tos” of life. We must edit the other six days before we can start practicing the Sabbath.

We must edit the other six days before we can start practicing the Sabbath.
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So this year, what do you need to move to the other six days, so that you can observe the Sabbath?

I’ll leave you with a few words from Ruth Haley Barton on this matter,

Sabbath keeping is the linchpin of a life lived in sync with the rhythms that God himself built into our world, and yet it is the discipline that seems hardest for us to live. Sabbath keeping honors the body’s need for rest, the spirit’s need for replenishment and the soul’s need to delight itself in God for God’s own sake. It begins with the willingness to acknowledge the limits of our humanness and then to take steps to live more graciously within the order of things.

And the first order of things is that we are creatures and God is the Creator. God is the one who is infinite; I, on the other hand, must learn to live within the physical limits of time and space and the human limits of my own strength and energy. There are limits to my relational, emotional, mental and spiritual capacities. I am not God. God is the only one who can be all things to all people. God is the only one who can be two places at once. God is the one who never sleeps. I am not. We can’t remind ourselves of this enough. This is pretty basic stuff, but many of us live as though we don’t know it.[4]

Let’s ensure that this is the year we have a weekly rhythm of being still and knowing that He is God by practicing the Sabbath.

*My article here was originally published on January 27, 2021 on Impactus.

[1] Ruth Haley Barton, Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, 118.

[2] Ruth Haley Barton, Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, 120.

[3] Mark Buchanan, The Rest of God, Location 1443.

[4] Ruth Haley Barton, Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership, 122.